Wednesday, July 21, 2010
I can't imagine you hating me. Ever.
So, there's this boy. He's a year older then me. We've 'talked' for a year and alot of months and nothings happened. Mostly because I was also chasing other guys and never taking him seriously, but once I do, I realize he's been with me through a lot. He's told me many times that he liked me, but I ran away, knowing he'd still be there. But the last time I did this, he cut me off. Once there were no text messages, emails, facebook comments, or phone calls, I began hurting. My pride was stone and I would not text him first. My best friends Georgi, Mia, and Jess, all told me that I was doing the right thing, but I was so beyond over the whole childish and ancient rule that guys had to make the first move. In the time that we weren't talking, I went to visit my cousin, Nikki, and I flirted with TONS of guys. There was Rocco, Riley, James, Chris, Bryan, Brenden, and more. I became friends with them on facebook and we talked for hours. I knew that he was getting jealous because I grew up with his best friend Logan, and Logan is also Georgi's boyfriend, and he told Logan everything, then it got back to me. We then started talking again, but we stopped texting after a week. Now I'm lucky if I get a 'hey' once in a while. I'm so d.o.n.e. I could have any guy I wanted, but he made me feel special. He'll text me "good morning, beautiful (:" and then he'll right on this girls wall and be like 'want to go to the movies?" Where the fuck does that leave me? I'm done fucking around. I'm so done. If he wants to talk to me, he will. I'm not going make myself look stupid or slutty by talking to him. We even went to winter formal together! What the fuck? Is it just me or is this situation fucked? Any advise?