Wednesday, March 16, 2011
I've never really had anyone I could open up too. I've never had that mentality to tell anyone what I was feeling. I never wanted anyone to know exactly what was going on with me, in fear of judging. I've come a long way from there, taking old blog posts and emailing them to Georgi, and waiting for her reaction. She had no idea exactly how I felt. Why? I don't except my feelings, I ignore them and hide behnd this smiling mask. But every once and a while, it cracks. Is it wrong to keep my personal life, personal? Does it make me a bad friend, not sharing MY secrets when they do? I've figured out why I'm guarded, why I haven't believed in love for so long, why I don't show emotion other then happiness-My parents. Their relationship was sofrazzled, for everyone. I didn't believe in love because I had never expirienced it first hand. I never knew how it was supposed to look. I never opened up because my sisters always teased me about my Elementary crushes, so I just stopped telling people. All together. I never show emotion because I didn't want to be judged. I didn't want anyone to look down on me. It was bullshit.
If any of you ever feel like you can't tell anyone that knows you personally how you feel, feel free to email me, get me on Facebook, or go to my tumblr ask as Anonymus. I never judge, but I'm there to listen. If you need someone to give you unbiased advise, I feel I'm good at solving problems. Not my own, but other peoples. I want you all to know that I love you, and I feel like we've been threw a lot together.
Never run away from your problems, face them head on. If you ever need help, that's what friends are for. ♥
X's and O's, Hannah. ♥